After work tonight, my dinner buddies and I all headed to a family friendly Chinese restaurant. I would mention the name, but quite frankly, I don't remember. It was a lovely buffet full of everything that makes a Chinese buffet, well, Chinese. These types of dinner items included but were not limited to: powdered doughnuts, shrimp, beef and broccoli, Chicken feet, some sort of crawdaddy critter thing, green beans and chicken fingers. Yes, it was quite the spread. So my dinner party and I browsed through the food options and made our selections. Not being that hungry, I resigned myself to eating one plate of food, a few pieces of watermelon (that tasted like watermelon minus the melon) and about five glasses of water. At the end of the meal, I felt pretty good, not full, not hungry but just right.
However, one of my dinner buddies,who for my own protection will remain nameless, left the restaurant practically in a wheelchair. The quantity of food eaten by him, I mean, this nameless person was minimal; although there were about five glasses of ice tea downed in a matter of an hour. The car ride home was the most enjoyable part of my day, as this nameless person sat in the backseat rubbing his/her stomach. Each bump caused a moan, and the speed bumps in the apartment parking lot nearly did him- or her- in. I also never knew how much fun a person could have by pulling on the seatbelt of a stuffed fellow passenger
Hopefully the Chinese overeater is fully recovered by now. If not, well as it said on my fortune cookie- "Courage is grace under pressure." (Whatever that means.)
Note: When talking with someone who has an upset stomach, avoid conversation regarding milkshakes that taste like Krispy Kreme (spelling), jaws wired closed and laughing.
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For those interested- the "him" is Matty G. But you didn't hear it from me.
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